I remember the last “Day 1″…March 14, 2015. I remember the determination – the surge of will underneath my skin teeming with excitement. I knew I was going to lose weight. I was too full of confidence not to. And I did. We all can go back and see with my “Day 183” post from this very month 5 years ago where I resigned my blog after having lost over 60 lbs. I started feeling badly for what felt like “bragging” over my weight-loss and I didn’t know how to overcome that feeling. On one hand I had earned it – I worked hard for it. But on the other hand, I knew all too well what it felt like to be hopeless and helpless and alone in this struggle. And somehow I felt like a fraud.
I kept that weight off for about a year. Then, as it does, the world kept turning and gradually all the weight crept back and before I knew what had happened, I was being suffocated by that old demon of mine. Clothes not fitting, sleep restless, body achy, fatigue, headaches, grouchiness – all of the telltale signs of being unhealthy were apparent in my life again. Did I jump up and say, “On me, warriors! To Battle!” No. I got depressed and angry and rebellious. Ready to eat myself right into an early grave and ensuring that I be buried with 30 boxes of Krispy Kreme donuts. But, somehow, here we are again. Day 1.
I am not as enthusiastic as I was back in March of 2015. I am more conciliated to the idea that this is the only course of action at this point. I have two choices, I can either get bigger, or I can lose the weight and try to find a new normal. Seems practical, really. I’m 45 years old, 5’5″, and 275-lbs today. My ankles hurt when I walk. My thighs chafe if I don’t wear long pants. I have resorted to sports bras because I can’t deal with how the regular ones pinch into my sides and shoulders. I think every little pain is a heart attack or a stroke or something else mortally devastating. I am thoroughly embarrassed attempting to put on a bathing suit – and I live in Florida, so that sucks.
My boss says, “The Future Belongs To Those Who Prepare For It”, and I think it’s high time that I take that lesson to heart and start preparing for the kind of future I want, even if that means that I have to sacrifice now. Once I get through my resolve, I hope to start using this blog to share some great Keto ideas and fun stories. As for now, this is my introduction, and I look forward to sharing this journey with you.
The Ke-To Living 